Illustration Friday:- pattern

My Artwork

Here's my art and drawings ( in no particular order ). If you want a commission or just a natter send me an email!



New Song: Your Touch is Cold.

It's been ar too long since I posted some of the new music I've been working on so here's a new piece for you!


Big Love


Ryan James

Outlaws and cake!

Today my wonderous mother in law turned up with a home made cake that I argue is actually proof that heaven exists and we spent a family day dog walking down the local Caswell Beach. It's a lovely little beach and the beautiful rocks and twists and turns are the perfect setting for dreamy conversations and big thoughts.

I thought a lot about the ridiculous nature of pressure and the need to be defined by success. It's been something of an undercurrent in my life for so long that I am having trouble shaking the remainder of it. What if I am enough, as I am? What if I can truly value myself as a success, as I am, right here in this moment? When I think about the bigger picture I see how insane my mental garbage truly is. Of course I am already a success! I am in bliss and five years ago I opened my heart just enough to allow peace. Because of that action I am incrementally becoming a silent observer as this unrelenting wave of peace takes over my life. But there are times when I am very human and I judge myself. I think about what others are doing and play the dangerous game of stacking their “accomplishments” next to mine. I am grateful that these moments are now extremely rare in my life but they do still show themselves. They serve as a reminder for me that I must reconnect with peace. That I must remind myself that I am good enough and complete enough and loved enough and whole enough right here, right in this moment.

On the beach today surrounded by family and love I became so immersed in the bigger picture that I could see my small concerns for what they were. They were fragments of memories of who I used to be. I remembered that success is the feeling place of life itself and there I was feet in the water, boyfriend chatting away, dog chasing the ball, I felt SO loved. How can success be defined as anything else? No amount of money, cultural approval or external observation could have improved that moment or created it. It is life and loving and being loved, that is the nature of success.

Big Love

 

Ryan James

x

 

 

I swear to god....

I am totally in love with this man.

I want to learn how to do this....

 

I need to learn how to do this! Anyone want to get together for a dragon mache messathon????

 

 

Big Love

 

Ryan James

Sharing your privilege.

Sharing your privilege.

I love you when I get up in the morning and I love you when I go to bed. I love you whether we are friends or even if we haven't met. I love you for no other reason than to enjoy loving you. I love you even if you hate me or have gone out of your way to hurt me, my love will never be defined or diminished by your pain. I love you even if you have spread rumours about me and thought hateful things about me because I deserve to feel good about you even if you can't feel good about yourself. I love you no matter what and that will never change. Sometimes I might need a little help getting to that space but I will love myself on my journey there and love myself when I am there too.

Love cures you and uplifts you and changes you. Loving people who love you is easy, it's play time for the soul. Loving people who are only able to show you their pain right now is more challenging but it can be done and more importantly you deserve to love them. It is sometimes a privilege they cant give themselves.

I woke this morning thinking of the incredible journey I have been on. My dog woke me up to feed him by hitting me in the face with his nose and the love of my life snoozed dreamily next to me. I woke in a bed inside a house I love, in a city I love, in a job I love and with friends and family I love and I am so grateful to be here. I did spare a small thought for those that couldn't join me where I am and I am glad that I can now look back with an open and honest heart and see only the good memories that we shared. I walked passed my old flat yesterday and thought about the good times I had there, the times I partied and laughed and shared and healed in those four walls will forever be a defining chapter in my life. That time rooted me in who I am and the time I am living in now is allowing it to flourish.

I discovered the power and privilege of unconditional love. I have discovered peace. These are now the undercurrents of everything that takes place in my life. This doesn't mean I don't get angry, sad or confused at times but it does mean I can get back to my centre a lot quicker than I used to. When you learn to love and to practice unconditional love your life will unravel to a state of true authenticity which is something I think everyone has the ability to do. With that in mind, begin.

Big Love

Ryan James

www.psychicswansea.co.uk

www.facebook.com/psychicswansea

My best friend.

 

It's cheesy and corny but it's true. I love this ball of fluff insane amounts! I would urge anyone thinking of getting an animal to rescue. They really are so loving!

 

Ryan James and Oscar!

 

I've also become one of those people who have a facebook page for their pet... and no, I don't have shame! wahaha  xx

 

 

 

 

How to live through grief.

 

How to live through grief.

We all grieve. We grieve for people that have transitioned to spirit, we grieve for who we were, we grieve for our innocence and we grieve for the living we have had to let go. We are all on some level in a state of grief because we are all on some level surrendering something. Grief is not simply missing someone, it is an acute and extremely tangible pain that demands healing and attention. It is generally not something that can be put on the back burner. The passing of time can help you to learn to live with it but what can we do to actually heal it?

When a dramatic change has entered your life and grief takes over there is one truth that we need to accept. You will never be the same again. You are different now and will be for the rest of your life. It is completely in your hands whether that can instigate a move towards becoming a stronger more loving version of yourself or whether the grief takes over and you cease to move forward. You will not only mourn for whatever has left your life but you will also mourn for the person YOU were during that interaction.

The first step is to make peace with a new version of who you are. This can feel extremely uneasy and in the cases where the grief is centred around a person transitioning to spirit, it can even feel a little disrespectful but it is a necessary step toward healing. If you are grieving a relationship loss then you can take what you have learned and make it onto something with a positive momentum in your life. If you are grieving a person you can take their love and light and allow it to continue it's work on the planet through you and your actions. There is no right and wrong way to handle grief, I have grieved very differently for different stages in my life. Relationship breakdowns, grandparents transitioning, a friend unexpectedly transitioning, friendships dissolving and generally growing and becoming a new person have required me to grieve in different ways at different times. You learn make peace with who you were within that experience and lovingly say goodbye to that old you and then you allow the new you to fill in the gaps. It can and will be challenging but it can be done.

Whatever your grief is please, be easy on yourself. Don't waste time trying to feel normal again, you have a new normal now, and it will serve you best to look for whatever that is for you. If you need to get things off your chest and no one is about then email me. I can't promise I will be able to answer all of you but I can promise that I will do my best and that I will keep you all in my prayers and my heart.

Big Love

Ryan James

www.psychicswansea.co.uk

www.facebook.com/psychicswansea

Chewing on a new idea...

Chewing on a new idea.

It is not very often in my life that I have felt truly lost. Don't get me wrong I regularly wander around the workings of my life like most people at some point feeling dazed and confused but I rarely, truly feel lost, especially as much as I have done this past year. Lost is that feeling of a quiet desperation behind a polite smile. Lost is a busy life masking a mind in pain. Lost is filling your time with the goals and dreams of others at the cost of your own heart. All of which I have done at points this year. My mum said that a lot of people “go a little funny” in their early thirties. It might be me dealing with no longer being young or maybe me not being where I thought I would be in my life. I have been forced into a state of perpetual surrender this past few years as I have opened my life to the feeling of true peace. The brighter this peace has become in my life the more glaringly obvious everything that is not of that peace has become.

I have prayed hard, talked to my friends relentlessly and done my best to ride the wave of evolution that has been working it's way through my system. I am generally the kind of person who, when I don't know what to do, I do EVERYTHING, and I mean everything. I work at every idea that crosses my mind and in the panic that has infiltrated my system over this last year it has often lead me to confuse desperate attempts at connection with genuine intuitive hunches. I know in my heart that I am exactly where I am supposed to be and exactly where I want to be. I know in my heart that I am living the life I am meant to and the life that is best for me but I also feel that the old remnants of an ego centred view of my life are preventing me from truly taking a good bite of the joy I have.

Each new level of self love demands a new level of trust in the Universe/God/The angels. I have put my life and my centre in it's hands plenty of times and been taken care of but my ego is effectively deceptive at helping me to forget to trust God. A jehovah's witness knocked my door the other day and began to unravel a picture of God as an absentee parent figure who is about to come back and give us all a slap around the head for being naughty boys and girls. I told him that God was the action of silence and he rests that silence on our heads because he has already put the answers to every question we may ever have in our hearts. We already know, I already know, as much as I may wrestle. The Jehovah's witness looked inspired, confused and began to stutter as he chewed on a new idea of God that challenged what he had been taught. I knew in that moment that I was doing the same. I have been stuttering around a new idea of being and living on the planet for a while now and it's time for me to trust more, love more and take the biggest bite I can!

Big Love

Ryan James

www.psychicswansea.co.uk