Sunday, 16 January 2011

On being obese and dealing with phallic mic stands...

By Leezann Davies

Christmas and New Years was nothing short of fantastic. I saw my family ( but not too much ), I saw my friends ( as much as I could ) and I saw a tin of quality street ( way too often ). And how my life has changed in such a short space of time. It’s just as if things are falling into places where spaces have already been made. My path feels exiting and set out. My routine has changed. My days are full and productive.

My first gig of the year was part of the Cheeky Monkey Mondays cabaret, and although its a very short set I am getting to play to people who wouldn’t normally get to hear my music which is nice. Plus they are always generous with their response! I actually like gigging in the Monkey Bar. It’s one of the few nice places left to gig, the sound in this one was one of the best ever and I could have played alot longer. The shortness of the set does limit what I can do I guess, I’m still looking forward to a long 45 minutes and then some set but that isn’t far off, not far off at all!

My last gig was in the Promised Land in Cardiff and that went..... ok. I’m not entirely sure whether it was my crowd that night, but a few friends from that neck of the woods got to see me play and that was the main thing. Although there was only one mic and the mic stand didn’t bend so ( in what I might add as an amazing feat of ingenuity ) I had to wedge the bloody thing in between my legs, the Cajon and the Keyboard. It was too phallic for words. I also had a good chat with the manager and it looks like a whole gig is on the cards up there too. Miss Jemma Krysa ( an act well worth researching ) drove me there and back and took me for a midnight McDonalds which was inhaled rather than chewed and I was so tired I didn’t care about the calories or eating cows eyelids.

Speaking of Calories, who else has had the misfortune of being stood on a Wii Fit recently? That white bitchy slab has been telling me for the last week or two that I am infact OBESE and must be shunned on sight ( ok I added the shunned part but the way it induces bodily shame should be considered a form of torture and used in interrogation of extremists, Bomb us will you? Well how about looking at THIS BMI?? We’d have weapons of mass destruction in minutes ). It did tell me to lose three stone though. I told it to fuckoff. I’ll focus on one stone, possibly. If I lost any more than that I’d be nothing more than a well groomed beard and a famished look and lets face it, my years of being pale and interesting are long done.

The only other bit of exiting news I have is that THE TOUR IS COMING ALONG SWIMMINGLY! On Feb 24th the Launch Night in Milkwood Jam begins and from there we are going all over the UK!! I can’t believe it is so close! You all have to come along and have a good old sing song with us. There are still dates to be confirmed and as soon as its all up I shall let you all know! I can’t speak too much on it just yet, cause there’s bits to still sort out and I’m going to save all that for another blog!

Anyhoo! Thanks for tuning in again!

Much Love

Ryan xxx